What Happens In Vegas Stays In Vegas
by Len-kun121958
Summary: The team is lead to Vegas when people are showing up dead in public places, although not realizing at first how close this case hits home for Reid he's left floundering as things start unfolding. The BAU learns a few things about their young genius they wish they didn't and Reid? How is he coping? They may not have time to find out.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Alright hey guys so this was just a fic that I had running through my mind constantly while on vacation for the last two weeks or so. I am heavily addicted to Criminal Minds and I figured it was about time I wrote something on it to give me a break from my usual stuff. Anyway, I haven't decided if I will continue this one or not past the point it's already at either way I enjoy it. WARNINGS are hint of rape, suicidal tendencies, molestation, drag addiction etc. If you think you're going to be triggered then don't read it and then flame me, just don't because I'm good at being a bitch online. Other than that, happy reading, reviews are appreciated but I'm not addicted to them. ~Rena-chan

Ch. 1

What Happens In Vegas Stays In Vegas

The BAU was wandering the streets looking for a quick bar to slip into after a grueling case that took them all the way to Maine. After they had all gotten some rest Hotch decided to take his team out for a drink. They had all accepted save for their youngest SA who had claimed he had immediate business to attend to. "I wonder where Reid wandered off to. It's normal for him to skip out on the social events but I wonder if he's holding up okay." Special Agent Emily Prentiss started off as she walked with the other girls.

"Knowing Junior G-Man he's probably stuffed his head in a book or something by now in a library." Special Agent Penelope Garcia, known as the tech goddess by more than a few of the members of the FBI, smiled as she thought of their little genius.

"I could bet on that, I thought after all these years he would have opened up a little more but he really sticks to the books. Pun intended." Special Agent Jennifer Jareau or JJ, the media specialists, smiled as she brushed the hair out of her face.

"He looked like he'd rather be teaching in a classroom rather than out on that last case to be honest. Pretty boy got wigged out after that officer tried to manhandle him into the interrogation room with him." Special Agent Derek Morgan, the Achilles of his time, shook his head with a sigh.

"That was on the officer and we all know it, he wasn't aware of the buttons he was pressing and without Reid telling him he proceeded to treat him like he would any other FBI agent he didn't like." the Unit Chief Aaron Hotchner or otherwise known as Hotch, reminded.

"My question is why didn't he say anything, he doesn't even say anything when we're too close to him except shrink away a little and if we're lucky we notice." Special Agent David Rossi questioned.

"I'm sure there's something that links that back to whatever he had to deal with as a kid. Probably nothing we should be discussing but something we all need to be aware of. We know he doesn't trust well, for whatever reason which is something I still need to work with him on." Hotch sighed.

"It's something we all need to work on with him Hotch not just you. After Gideon's leave, it's as though Reid crawled back into his comfort habits which is worrisome on its own." Derek pointed out and though he really didn't want to bring up or entertain the idea of the worst case scenario just yet he knew it was in the back of everyone's minds.

"We will have to start working on that later guys, we have another case. Morgan will you call or text Reid and tell him to meet us back at the station?" JJ asked with a sigh, a few groans passed but JJ knew her colleagues wouldn't be doing this job if they didn't know they would have endless nights and long days. Morgan pulled out his phone and dialed the young doctor's number hoping to all hell that he would pick up.

"Reid, we have another case, meet us down at the station in ten and call me back." he voiced then shut his phone and stuffed it back in his pocket.

"He didn't pick up?" Prentiss asked immediately worried, whenever Reid didn't answer his phone it usually meant he was either dying at the hands of an UnSub or something tragic had happened and he couldn't tell anyone about it.

"Not this time, the line was busy so he will get the message and meet us down. I'd bet he's talking with his mom. He said something about calling her when he got home tonight." Morgan assured though he knew it would only do so much and the members of the BAU would still worry until they saw Reid walking on his own into the office safe and sound. It was a price of him being the unfortunate target of many UnSubs and falling into the 'little brother' or 'son-like figure' role for many of the agents. At his last words a couple of the agents seemed to be a little less worried thankfully.

"Good, we don't need a repeat of Tobias. Or any of the other Reid-fancying UnSubs since we're going to his hometown in Vegas. Think he could get us into a Casino?" JJ joked lightly trying to ease her worries.

"That's assuming he hasn't been kicked out of all of them already, have you ever played him in Poker? It's impossible to beat him." Morgan grumbled with both Rossi and Hotch nodding, they'd had a few fun rounds with the genius before and safe to say there was no way he could be beat.

"If it was anyone

Reid I'd accuse of them counting cards but he's too good to fall to petty tricks like that." Rossi added in just before the team split up into their SUVs and headed for the station. Thankfully not long after them getting into the briefing room Reid walked in with a coffee in hand looking as good as ever.

"Alright what do we have and where are we going?" he asked taking a seat next to Prentiss and Morgan as usual.

"I'll start with the first question, we're looking at teen-mid twenties deaths. All the same MO of being injected with a type of poison, going to sleep and never waking up again. There's also a message that's been left at every crime scene, written on a small piece of paper like this next to the dead bodies." JJ started as she pulled up a picture of a neatly written note laying a little ways from a boy looking to be about eighteen years old if not younger.

"

" Rossi read aloud and blinked.

"It's written in first perspective yet the victim more likely than not had either already been dead by the time it was written or they were notes written before the crime was committed and then placed at the scene accordingly. We know we're looking for a man, judging by the age of that victim I'm making an educated guess that he is around the same age as his older victims in the early to mid-twenties. Statistically he is most likely to be a white male with a struggling background given that he claimed he had given them what they longed for meaning he thinks he's doing them a favor. Saying "the rest" means that he plans on killing more, by the position and lack of any abuse visible to the victim I doubt he's in it for any anger or sexual related causes. Whoever our UnSub is, he thinks he is helping one way or another." Reid rattled off while stirring his coffee and looking through the pictures of a few of the other victims. JJ couldn't help the smile that crossed her lips as she pulled up the pictures of all the victims.

"So far all of the kids have shown up in different places that don't look like they have any connection, we have the alley by a coffee shop, the mall bathroom, they found two kids in the same building but on completely different floors. In total there are around fourteen victims found and not a single missing persons report filed. Race doesn't look to play a factor and neither does gender. All of them are found looking like this." she continued, thanking her lucky stars it was nothing gruesome because she didn't think anyone could handle that right now. The pictures displayed showed the victims lying down with their eyes closed and a trace of a smile on their faces. Totally relaxed and at peace, they looked like they were sleeping.

"No sign of struggle at all, that suggests that they trusted the UnSub for whatever reason...could be someone they knew or a figure of authority they trusted like a cop or doctor." Prentiss suggested with a frown when she saw Reid's eyes widen and his complexion pale slightly before he covered it up again quickly as possible.

"This is Vegas we're talking about, the likelihood of kids of these ages trusting a policeman or anything of that kind are slim." Derek pointed out, he too had noticed Reid's reaction but decided not to press it otherwise they'd be lucky to get him out of his hotel room for a solid week.

"The local police in Vegas can't keep having these kids showing up dead, with no way to stop it and the public of Vegas going into a panic they've called us for help." JJ eventually said after a moment of silence.

"Then there's no use in us standing around here, everyone get packed. We leave as soon as possible." Hotch stepped in before anything more could be said. The team nodded and packed up before heading off to pack and then meet down at the airport so they could head out.

Reid looked down at his cell as he hung up while Morgan and JJ were walking up to where they would board shortly. They still had to wait for Penelope, Hotch, Rossi and Prentiss but the three figured they'd be there shortly as well. "Who was that, you're next hot date Pretty Boy?" Morgan joked lightly as he approached.

"You wish you had that over my head, no agent flirt, that was my mother." Reid answered making a display of rolling his eyes, at that information however Morgan frowned slightly.

"If you just called her now, then who were you on the phone with when I tried to call you earlier?" he questioned, Reid blinked at him for a second and looked like he would rather have sprinted down the runway over answering that question. Instead he shoved a quivering hand into his pocket and avoided his gaze.

"A friend, a long time friend, from back home. It had been a while since he called and we couldn't help but chat for a while." the young doctor finally managed to say in a somewhat normal voice though Morgan could tell the slight waver in it. JJ looked over, upon hearing the conversation, concern written all over her face but before either could press more the other team members got there and they all boarded the jet.

"Alright guys, let's start talking, but before we do that I have to tell you all that we will be working with a special force unit from Vegas. They're Las Vegas' Special Victims Unit, they over all deal with more of the law and politics part of the job that we do. We're being involved with them because on of their members has some insight to this case and wants his department to be helpful. I'll introduce you to the main agents we will be working with at the airport." Hotch began before the group went over their case file once again.

"I'll start getting the geography put together once we get down there, I have my suspicions and I want them to be confirmed before I say anything to definitely." Reid spoke up putting the file down and checking his phone again, it wasn't totally out of character for the young genius to be quiet and not participate in discussions without prompting but there was something off about his tone that even had the unit chief looking up in question. Spencer's head was down so he didn't see the questioning looks his team mates were throwing at each other and Hotch was secretly thankful for that. Saying the kid wasn't good with people fretting over him was a massive understatement.

'What is going on...with that last case I can understand distancing himself from it but this one. It doesn't even look like he can fully process it without turning away.' Rossi questioned himself as the genius excused himself and took a call to the back of the plane.

"I know you're all worried right now, just don't let him see that. We need to focus so start throwing out ideas." Hotch instructed with a bit more force than needed.

"So we know from Boy Genius that we're looking for a male most likely around early to mid twenties, white and thinks he's doing these kids a favor. We know he can get comfortable with them but we don't know how." Morgan started though it took effort to drag his mind away from Reid.

"Then there is the whole thing about no one filing a missing person's report for

of these kids. I can't see that as being possible. Can we get Garcia on? I want her to check the families of these victims and find something in common." Prentiss pointed out soon after.

"Yeah let's get on that, Garcia can you hear us alright?" JJ asked pulling up the screen with their tech's face on it.

"Good afternoon, what can your all knowing oracle do for you?" the ever dramatic techie asked effectively pulling a smile or a chuckle out of everyone, with the exception of Hotch, and changing the mood quickly.

"We were looking at these kids, it says there weren't any missing person's reports filed for any of them. Can you see if there's something that links all of the victims?" Prentiss questioned as Reid came back and joined them.

"Of course I can, I'll have everything about them and their families checked and sent to the office you're headed to since it'll take a while. There just had to be so many of them. Catch him guys, I want this sucker caged. Garcia out!" came the reply with no short of emotion.

'Would it be best if I removed myself from this case? If Garcia successfully finds out where these kids are all connected there's a possibility she will come across us. What will the team think if they find that out?' Reid questioned in his head, preoccupied with everything else he hardly registered that they were in the airport of Vegas until he heard someone introduce herself to Hotch.

"Pleased to meet you Agent Hotchner, we're thankful for not only coming down to Vegas but also working with my team to catch this guy." she smiled politely at him and shook his had in greeting.

"Believe me we want him on the streets no longer than you do. Team this is Special Victims Unit Chief Jax Press. Ms. Press this is my team, Derek Morgan, David Rossi, Emily Prentiss, Jennifer Jareau, I believe you have met our techie online Penelope Garcia and of course this is Dr. Reid." Hotch introduced as usual.

"It's a pleasure to meet you all, behind me is Spec-" she was cut off when a man about the same height as Reid flung himself into the doctor's arms.

"Holy shit it really

you! I haven't seen you in god what feels like forever Spen! You said you'd come visit me more often!" the outgoing beach blond haired and green eyed man said. Morgan couldn't help but feel his eyebrow twitch when he saw Reid hugging him back with an acceptance that none of them had seen on his face before.

"Sorry Gray, life's been busier than normal lately. While I'm here we'll have to catch up sometime." he replied with a slight laugh when the other let out a 'we fucking better or your ass is going to be glued to whatever office seas you sit in' before they pulled apart again.

"You two know each other then?" Jax questioned looking from her normally very professional agent to the young doctor.

"Course we do, we grew up in the same area out here in the city that never sleeps. Got into all types of trouble as most Vegas boys do. Oh right, I'm SVU agent Grayson Case." he smiled brightly and rocked onto his toes a little as he spoke.

"Pleasure to be working with you as well, shall we head back to the office and get some work done then?" Hotch asked as he turned back to a still confused looking Jax. she nodded and they split into groups, Spencer and Grayson chatted endlessly through the ride catching up on old times. It was obvious to everyone they were close, how close exactly no one could fully say but it was very close.

'With Grayson working with me, maybe I will stay on. I mean he went through it all too. We do things together right? That's how it's supposed to stay for things like this.' the genius thought with a sense of needed ease washing over him.

As they got back to the office and set their things up Garcia checked back in with the team over the computer. "Garcia what do you have for us?" Prentiss asked as they watched the faces of the victims pop up along with files.

"So much and yet so little, between the victims themselves the only true connection is the two siblings Kyle and Kayla Brown, now pictured on the screen. Kyle at seventeen went to the same high school as several of the older victims yet he dropped out on account of being deemed suicidal and put into a facility for a few months. Other than the suicide record and that drop out of school there's no record on him. His sister is different however. It looks like she also dropped out of school not long after going to police about her abusive mother. The whole thing fell through and she has a lack of anything on her. I looked into their family, their father died in a house fire that happened when the kids were at a summer camp years ago. Their mother raised them after that and aside from that one complaint there's nothing bad about her so it seems. Looking into the other victims I've found similarities in that they're seemingly functional families. There's something that someone has, information that's not on record for whatever reason. I need to know where that information is being held before I can find a connection between all of them." Garcia answered with a frown.

"So the only thing we have on the mother is the reported abuse from her child who was found...where?" Morgan raised an eyebrow.

"Let's see Kyla Brown was found on the rooftop of the local high school in the area they lived. Her brother was found in the park under a tree only an hour later." came the reply from the unhappy tech.

"Two totally different locations across town from one another, it looks like it's random placing but I'm not so sure. Do we know if there had been instances that those two had spent a lot of time in those areas?" Rossi suggested.

"The kid that reported Kyla's body said they'd often see her up there after school hours and even when the school was shut down though they didn't have any idea how she got up there. Apparently she was known in school as the quiet reserved type that kept to herself and didn't try making many friends." Morgan supplied.

"Alright, so maybe the UnSub is placing these kids in areas he knows they feel comfortable, a place they feel safe. If I'm in a safe zone I feel more compelled to trust others. Even someone I don't know at all." Jax commented causing a few other nods to go around.

"Let's check that by having a few agents go around and find out if these kids are seen a lot in the places they were found prior to their death. Morgan and Prentiss why don't you go check the areas around Jensen Baker, Patricia Hewitt, Gabriel Townston, Max White and Pepe Torres. Rossi and Jax can look at Amelia Handson, Chelsea James, Jenna Smith, Jamison Anders, and Hannah Sencer for now, JJ try and keep the media under control, I'm going to try and locate this missing information with the government and it looks like Reid and Case have got this place secured, they'll keep us updated with Garcia and with whatever they find according to whatever they're looking into." Hotch instructed, everyone briefly turned to look at the two agents working diligently on a map as well as passing around notes and putting up the profiles Reid had got from Garcia.

"I thought Case worked fast alone but it looks like your doctor is causing him to pick up the pace more than I would think possible." Jax shook her head in disbelief.

"That's what happens when you have an IQ of 187." Morgan told her flatly as he grabbed his things and they all split up.

As the team met back up in the conference room Reid and Case listened intently but did only that unless they were directly asked a question. 'They're getting closer, they're going to find out about everything. Hotch...how will he take it? He was peeved when he found out about Morgan's past criminal record and even though this isn't a criminal record it's most definitely not on my file...Gideon made sure of that so how will he react once he finds out?' Reid asked fidgeting with his hands unknowingly.

"Alright so from all the accumulative data we can confirm that this guy knows these kids enough to know where they feel comfortable, weather he gets them there or elsewhere it's unclear as of now." Rossi started off as he entered the room with Jax after they checked out the last of the victims.

"Guys I think I've got something here." Garcia sounded from the computer.

"Go ahead Sugar Mama." Morgan voiced to her making the girl smile.

"Alright, so I was looking into the family of Jamison Anders, the sixteen year old, and it looks like there there was a file on the father about being sexually abusive towards his son. That case went through and he was separated from the family and Jamison was sent to this clinic. A clinic for kids who have been sexually abused, it serves both temporary and permanent housing thanks to Hotch getting through to the files on the kids I've been able to find every single one of our victims has spent a good amount of time there for one reason or another so the chances of our UnSub not having a connection to that place is nearly zilch." she explained, Reid gave a brief look to his friend before the two of them exited the room to make a call to someone they knew at the clinic.

"Okay that helps us, so we know where this guy is from, can you get the files of everyone that's been there for a good length of time so they would know these kids?" Prentiss requested.

"Already on it, there's around six thousand kids that have record with them, all the files had seals on them for confidentiality reasons. I have to say though with the profile we have nearly half of these kids could fit the pro-oh my god." Garcia cut herself off, the team waited and watched with concern as the tech master seemed to freeze up and just stare at the screens in front of her.

"Garcia? Is something wrong?" JJ asked as they heard the woman trying to muffle sobs.

"I f-found the list of kids that would be in the age range and fit the profile, there's a-about twenty of them in total. You're not going to be happy with me saying this but I found a familiar face among them." she managed to choke out. The profiles and images were loaded onto the large screen in the conference room and everyone stopped when they reached two pictures on the far left.

"Where are Reid and Case?" Hotch demanded, safe to say he was livid.

"They left the office. We don't know." JJ whispered coming back from looking outside.

"Garcia, this is not something I want to ask of you and know that if I didn't have an absolute choice I wouldn't for both all of us and them. But we don't have a choice, I need the full extent of all of the profiles. Including Reid's and Case's." Hotch finally managed out. As much as he would have loved to think this was all a dream he knew it wasn't. No, this was the harsh reality, harsh in the most pure form it could be and he prayed to whatever god was out there that Reid would talk to them again when this whole thing was over.

"All the profiles are on their way, to the printers. You should have them right about now, please someone tell me that things are going to be alright." she whispered, Morgan assured her that he would at least bring their genius back home to Virginia before she signed off and the team collected the papers she sent them.

"They probably know by now, fuck what the hell do we do?" Grayson paced back and forth in the apartment he lived in.

"I shouldn't be saying this, but fourteen of us are gone, we have to protect him. If he get dragged into the station all hell is going to break loose and we're the only ones who know that." Spencer answered with his head in his hands. Never in the agent's life did he think his darkest times would be open for the BAU to read through. And there was nothing he could do about it.

"You know he won't go down without a fight either way, if he sees us his reaction...I don't know if I can watch that without going to him." Grayson stopped his pacing and looked back at a curled up and crying Spencer.

"I can't believe he would...no I can, I just...why did it have to be him?! Why couldn't it have been someone else, why didn't he ask me? He could have called me! I would have flown down here and taken off work no matter what Hotch said. If he gets locked away, do you have any idea the statistics of getting raped in prison are?! I can't let them do that to him, I have to send him to a facility or something I have to make another option!" the genius vaguely felt the arms encircle him as he battled with a fit of what could be considered hysteria.

'Why Jay, I know the reason behind this but why didn't you call us? We promised to keep in touch Jay. You were always looking to end our pain, Jay you stopped us from ending it all more times than anyone should have to! Why did you let yourself slip so far without telling us! Without telling Spencer?!' Grayson couldn't help but scream in his mind as he saw his younger friend break down. He was shattered and it wasn't certain if he was going to be able to be strong enough to get put back together no matter who was there to help him. "The other agents of the BAU will be tracking us back here soon Spen, we're better off facing the fire sooner rather than later." he tried in a calmed voice.

"I know, and I know how to bring him in. But it's only something we can do. I won't have the BAU or the SVU involved in this anymore. It can only be between us and the clinic members. We can stop this without causing panic and so much more pain." came the muffled and worn reply. Grayson looked at his longterm friend, he always trusted the younger with everything. When Spencer first joined the clinic he never thought he would stay with him for his whole life, he was the only one he could really talk to and he knew he served the same purpose for Spencer. There was a connection, a bond between them that they couldn't afford to let anything mess with. If that happened they would both lose their lifeline.

"Okay, let's put this plan of yours in order and then we'll go down to the station and tell them what's going to happen." he breathed, feeling arms wrap around him he couldn't help but to bury his face in the other male's shirt and shatter as the other had done previously.

The team, with the exception of Reid and Case, were sitting in what looked like a warm elementary classroom only there were no desks or chairs and the windows were larger. The clinic worker they were talking with was named Josephine Haux and she was being interviewed about their UnSub Jay Hefter. None of the team wanted to be left out of the information and none of them were surprised that she had watched over him, Reid and Case when they were here. "I had a feeling this would happen one day, I just didn't think it would be like this or with Jay for that matter..." she trailed off after wiping her eyes again.

"What can you tell us about Jay? Who did he spend the most time with and what did he usually act like around them verses everyone else while he was here?" Prentiss asked slowly and cautiously.

"Jay was always very observant of everyone here, he never wanted any harm to come to any of the others. He strived to help them in anyway he could, he wanted them to be free and happy because he knew that even if there were cases filed against the parents for abuse most of them fell through and the children would end up worse than anyone could imagine. He made it his life's goal to make sure they would find happiness in the darkest of worlds they lived in. He treated everyone as he would a little sibling, always protective and ready to put himself on a bomb for them if that meant they could be safe." she answered with a fresh set of tears and more comforting words from JJ.

"And his friends? Did he have any that stood out to you more than everyone else?" the blonde asked softly.

"Oh yes," Josephine smiled a little in fond remembrance, "Jay always looked out for the younger kids. The two he attached himself to, despite their initial resistance, were two boys by the names of Spencer and Grayson. They spent days reading and sometimes they would just lay on the couch and say nothing but it was obvious it was a comfort method he had picked up on. He really took to Spencer once he came in, he and Grayson had always had a connection but when the youngest joined them they were inseparable. I never understood the depths of their connection but they'd always go to each other. Spencer never talked unless they were around, he'd sooner be cornered by that window over there with his head in his knees. The older boys eventually broke down his barrier enough god knows how. Then the three of them had been moved to being under watched care, it wasn't clear how suicidal Jay was because most of the attention around that was focused on the other two. He requested to be moved up there with them and at the time that was our best options to keep the selfharm on a manageable level." she ended focused on the hands in her lap. Morgan had to keep himself from breaking through one of the windows and running to find Spencer and Case, Hotch wanted the entire team here and said they would come when they felt okay enough to.

"Did Jay ever display any sort of self destructive tendencies?" Rossi feared there was a reason Reid fell so easily into the addict role after what he had been told about Tobias, but he didn't really want to think about how it all started.

"Now that you mention it yes he did, the nurses that come through had to take him off of the anti-depressants because they were disappearing too quickly. We assumed he was giving them to Spencer and Grayson so in order to help the three of them we took him off. I figured more than anything he just wanted the boys to be happy and if his drugs did that he would give them over." came the reply.

"How old were the two boys when they first met Jay?" JJ tried keeping herself from wanting to learn more about her co-worker but she couldn't help it.

"Ah let's see, Jay was already here by the time they came in, Grayson was first and if memory serves me correct he was about five at the time. Spencer came in two years later at the age of four and at that time Jay had to have been nine. Neither of the boys had permanent stay here and went home every night which enraged Jay more than we expected. He was never the violet type but we had to keep him in an isolated room a few hours after every day they would leave for home." the interview went on and sever boxes of tissues later the team exited the building with emotions reaching sky high and beyond.

"He was never going to tell us had we not found out, was he." Rossi stated more than asked. Hotch shook his head and refrained from finding whoever was responsible for putting Reid in there and snapping his neck. He could tell Jax was feeling something along the same lines judging by the rage that washed over her eyes.

"How do we catch him and in doing so are we going to lose..." Prentiss started but choked up and stopped before she could finish her sentence.

"I don't know the exact numbers, seeing as I'm not Reid, but we've been on countless child molestation, abuse and murder cases. What are the chances that they've been flooding through his mind and killing him from the inside out since day one? Reid is in a lot more pain now than he's ever going to let us in on or let us help him with and has been for years. Right now we have to trust that he will make it through eventually but it's going to take a lot of time." Hotch replied as they piled into the SUV.

"We still don't know where he is either. Four, four years old god damit! Who does that?!" JJ seethed, she was seconds away from going into a blind rage.

"If whoever it is isn't already in jail we will see to it that they get locked away for good." the unit chief growled as he pulled into the station's parking lot to see the object of their conversation inside talking, Grayson at his side, with someone as they looked at a computer.

"At least he came back here." JJ couldn't help the sigh of relief that left her lips, her teammates had similar reactions to the sight. 'This time.' she added in her mind with a worried tone.

"You want us to do what?" Hotch questioned with narrowed eyes at the two small looking agents in front of him.

"We need both the BAU and the SVU to let us handle the rest and back off until the interrogation when we bring him in. I am fully aware that there are protocols against this but we know how to bring him in without resistance or hostility. Technically we should be taken off this case seeing as you obviously know our connection to not only it but the UnSub personally." Reid started to explain before Grayson stepped in.

"But because of that and our connections around Vegas we know how to do this the fastest." he supplied with Reid nodding.

"Reid you realize that this request will go on your record as we-" Hotch began with a hardened gaze before he was cut off by his agent.

"I'm sorry Hotch but this isn't a request." for once the team looked between Reid and Hotch as they stared each other down, eventually to everyone's surprise their chief nodded and backed down to the younger.

"I will not let you conduct the interrogation and you will need to bring him here." he said with a clipped tone telling everyone he wasn't happy about it. "And we will be meeting in my office once we get back to Quantico." he added which had Grayson sending his friend a concerned look. Reid however nodded and took the well meant partial glare in stride.

"I'll accept full responsibility once this is over, for now Grayson if you call Mrs. Haux I'll send out the email to everyone. It will take approximately an hour two if there's longer insecurities to work through." Reid replied turning back to his laptop and typing at a speed that even Garcia would marvel at.

'Please, just let this go smoothly for them.' JJ found herself thinking as the team watched and then decided to take a break in the conference room when Hotch asked them to meet there and leave the two at their work. The head of the SVU went out for coffee and to pick up some lunch orders.

"Technically this case isn't in our hands even for the moment, so let's everyone get out the concerns we've been having ever since we found out about...the clinic and Reid." Rossi started once the door was shut, thankful the room was soundproof and the team had a place they could bounce concerns and observations off each other.

"I'm going to have Garcia see if she can find anything reported against anyone from Reid." Morgan started with a slight smile, he would love it if he could snap the person responsible for all this in half.

Reid looked over the email he had written and sent to everyone he knew was involved with the clinic when he was there everyday. Thankfully everything was going smoothly and soon he found himself in the familiar room with Grayson and at least a hundred other people. He knew Hotch had security cameras installed so they could keep tabs on the meeting but over all he was back in the frame of when he felt this was the only safe place he had. An ordinary day that he came to the clinic, Grayson met him at the door as usual and soon called Jay over before the young kid could curl himself in a corner somewhere. "You look nervous, are you going to be okay with our next session? You know we can step out and just breathe if we need to sit out of the room. My room is open to us." Jay's voice entered his mind as arms encircled his torso, normally he would have flinched or backed away but with Jay all he wanted to do was stay in those arms.

"N-no, I have to participate in this one. If I don't I-I'll never..." his voice started out febily, he purposefully had the session focus on something that he had been struggling with since he was four years old. He didn't manage to get any more words out because Jay had hushed him soothingly and stroked his hair. Jay was still taller than him, he didn't know how tall to be exact and he didn't care, his straight light brown hair was cut short in a style that fit him and his calming blue eyes drew Reid in just as he remembered. "Jay I missed you, so much, I can't believe it. W-why did I walk away?" he couldn't believe what he was saying, he knew exactly why he walked away once he could but being back here just filled him with emotions so strong he felt dizzy. 'Can I go through with this without relapsing? Can I actually do this like I thought?' he questioned trying to keep the tears from falling.  
"Come on Rabbit, let's go on the couch until the session starts and calm you down. G-man how are you holding up?" Jay asked as he extended an arm out to the other male with them.

"I-I've had better days I mean I'm back here aren't I?" came the hesitant reply as he was wrapped in the older man's other arm and assured that he was safe here before they all went to the couch. Spencer sat on the end pulling his knees to his chest and leaning on the other while Grayson sat on the other side and hayed his back against Jay's other side. The three were comfortable and talked with each other, Jay spent a lot of the time talking with Grayson as he combed through Spencer's hair and and kept him secured in the corner where he knew the younger felt the safest.

"I expected them to be close because of what Josephine had told us but...that's more than just close, those guys look like they're a lifeline for each other. Hotch I'm not sure this was a good idea, what happens when we take him in? What is going to happen to Reid and Case?" JJ asked as she watched them laugh and talk together. The other people there were also sharing stories and talking as though it was a normal day in the clinic.

"Alright everyone let's start this session." Josephine started and clapped her hands. The group gathered around where they were the most comfortable as she started talking.

"We're going to have to trust that Reid and Case will be strong for us after all this. Even then I want everyone to keep a close but unnoticable eye on him once we get back to Quantico. Remember that he will not have Grayson, his mother, Jay, his father or Mave who we know was a deep connection. He is going to back away from us, he is going to refuse our offerings and try to become lost in whatever he can in order to keep down the memories of whatever is going to happen in the end today." Hotch answered with a determined voice.

"And for hell's sake, please everyone keep an eye on his apparent suicidal tendencies." Prentiss heard Rossi say from behind her. The team couldn't agree more to that, losing Reid was one thing, losing Reid because of himself was something none of them could handle. The guilt would be too much.

"What did Reid and Case set up the session to be about today?" JJ asked in a small voice.

"Looks like they're talking about the abuse outright itself. Meaning we're not going to like what we hear, at all." Prentiss supplied as she closed her eyes in preparation for a moment.

"I remember the hands, more than anything, the way the grips were so unforgiving, relentless. The voices, what they said, even before the physical abuse started had my mind locked in a pool of self hate." one girl started out when no one was talking.

"Self hate, that thing that you can't ever really get rid of. Except...it's just so appealing! I thought I was over it, I thought I could just walk out of rehab and live normally but that's not true. They tell you lies! They say you're going to be okay again well news flash it's not. I can't help but want to throw myself off a bridge, the need to escape from this wretched life, I want peace I want to be able to see my family. I want to sleep and to never wake up, but they don't tell you that you're going to struggle your whole life after abuse. They don't tell you anything." a young boy, probably younger than twenty, exploded in a fit of rage and then drowning into sobs as he rocked himself back and forth before he was finally calmed from the girl who spoke before him.

"That's accurate, people expect you to be able to function, to hold a conversation and to keep a steady income coming without you spending everything on the next drug or bottle you see." Case added on in a small voice.

"It's never mentioned how badly those whips from that belt, the knuckles from familiar hands and the f-fucking feeling of your ch-childhood taken away from you. If someone had told me that when I was first taken away I never would have tried to keep living. I would have poured gas on myself and let the match drop." another girl, probably around the age of sixteen, confessed as she wiped the tears with the sleeves of her sweatshirt.

"I know this is painful, I don't want to ask this question, but how many of you have been suffering from either tendencies or further abuse since what initially brought you to this door?" Jay asked looking around him to everyone, especially Reid and Case, the tone in his voice was calm and collective. It was supportive and it made the participants relax quite obviously. "Just raise your hand, no words have to be spoken." he furthered with a look in his eyes that told everyone he was there for them. He would let them cry on his shoulder, he would protect them. Slowly hands rose, first only a couple then ten, then twenty, the numbers kept growing until over half the room had raised hands. That, to the unfortunate lack of surprise from the BAU with the exception of Garcia and JJ, included Reid and Case.

"It's easy to tell yourself it's over once the main nightmare of your life isn't able to reach you. But people forget...people forget that some days the nightmare that was once only one person becomes three, four, five or more..." Spencer's voice was so quiet the group watching had to strain their ears just to hear him. The ones who had clearly heard him were Jay and Grayson and they both nodded along.

"If you think about it, the verbal abuse and even the major beat downs...they were nothing compared to that feeling. That feeling that was so damn painful, driving deeper and deeper, driving you into darker and darker places. Nothing can be compared to that feeling of hate, that feeling of loss and complete uselessness." Grayson piped up eventually as his blunt nails tore at his hands in a near frantic manner. Josephine nodded solemnly as the group continued to talk to each other about how much they wanted to have a normal life, make a name for themselves and forget the past that haunted dreams and caused them to fear.

"Alright everyone let's all take a break as the schedule permits it. You can go off campus if you want but keep together if you do." she eventually interjected into the conversation as the kids in front of her all looked like they were about to go into relapses and flashbacks.

"Jay, Spen, can you guys come with me? I want to step out for a while and just sit and talk somewhere not in a room...no walls." Grayson asked and that was a clear signal to Hotch that is was time.

"Yes, no walls...no room, sounds good." Spencer nodded vigorously, his head felt so dizzy and filled with fog despite that he knew what was coming next would be so much harder. Jay smiled and nodded to both of them, he told Josephine before the trio walked out of the building and to the benches across from the police department under Grayson's plead.

"Hey Rabbit, you look pale, what's going on?" Jay asked sliding a hand to Spencer's forehead. It felt a little warm according to him.

"M-my head hurts is all, I feel a bit dizzy, but that's probably because of a f-flashback it's o-okay." he answered once he was able to comprehend what all was being asked of him.

"Spen I don't think you're alright, maybe we should get you inside...they probably have some cool water in the police department that may help your head." Grayson offered as he stand and took a hold of the sweating hand belonging to his friend.

"I agree with G Spencer, let's get you on a couch." Jay agreed without hesitation as he stood as well and helped the younger up. Grayson kept a hold of his hand, flashing worried looks to Spencer at least once every second that passed if that was possible. By the time they actually got into the station Spencer looked only partially conscious, Jay ended up carrying him to the room because he didn't think the kid would actually make it to the couch. A cup now half full with water was on the table near the couch and the three boys were silent except for the occasional shifting. It was then that JJ stepped into the room and introduced herself.

"You all may call me JJ, I work here temporarily, Jay can I just borrow you for a few minutes to ask some questions? We can help your friend." she promised, though it was reluctant Jay followed with a nod leaving Spencer with Grayson. Instead of the interrogation room she brought him into the conference room with the entire team there since that was what Reid had asked saying it would be the most comfortable place the in the office. "Jay this is my team, they'll ask you some questions too and then we'll let you go back out there to see your friends. You all seem really close." she said with a warm smile.

"We are, those two are my lifeline, I'd like to think I'm theirs as well. The youngest one, Spencer though I call him Rabbit, on the couch called me quite a few months ago saying he was pretty lost. As much as I'd like to say he's better...clearly there's a lot he's still facing. I don't really wish to be separated from them for very long if you don't mind." Jay answered with sincere concern flowing off his body in waves. JJ swallowed hard and nodded before she sat down.

'I can't believe an UnSub could be so caring and protective. Evil and harsh yes but never are they like this.' she thought trying to keep herself from bursting into tears.

"He seems like a very strong kid with everything on his plate. Why do you call him Rabbit?" Rossi asked, halfly because he was just simply amused at the nickname.

"Oh, that's because he's always on high alert, observant of everything and everyone around him. And because if you find something he likes to talk about, or knows something about his words just jet out of him. You don't get to hear him speak very much, probably thanks to his father, but when he does...I could listen to him forever." Jay replied with a smile that could have literally lit up the room had the power gone out just then.

'No wonder they became attached, no wonder the victims felt so safe with him.' Morgan blinked.

"He's the type that even though you and he both know he's fully capable of doing things far beyond your skill level you want to protect him from the world of harsh reality and pain. When he breaks, it's the most painful thing to watch in the world. I've helped others find peace before, helped them to escape the world where they were trapped, but the ones I really want to save are G and Rabbit. They deserve it more than any two kids I know walking on this planet." Jay kept speaking, his voice so fond and brotherly towards the two it almost physically hurt the agents to know they would have to take him away.

The group continued questioning, even after they got their technical confession, about how the three boys lived and what Jay knew about them. It was unfortunate for them that Jay started to figure things out, that the team was purposefully keeping him away from the other two and that's when he went what Rossi could claim to be hysterical. They had to handcuff him to keep him from hurting himself, since he was convinced he was going to prison and would die, he kept screaming at the top of his lungs in a panic wracked fit that eventually Reid and Case overheard when JJ opened the door unknowing what to do. "Spencer! Grayson! Help me! They're going to kill me! I'm going to die! Help, you have to help me! Please I can't go, I can't be there! I'll get raped, I'll get abused again! I can't Spencer! Spencer please help me! I only wanted to help them! I only wanted them to be free of this hell! Tell them G, tell them that I kept you safe, I kept you from leaving how many times?!" he screamed in his hysteria as the two boys walked towards the room.

"Eighteen, eighteen times you kept me safe Jay, you need to calm down Jay they're not going to send you away, we won't let them." Grayson soothed as they got close enough to be heard.

"How many times did I keep you here Spencer, Spencer please tell them I helped you, that I helped you stay safe." Jay pleaded, the tears streaking down his face as he cried on his knees.

"Twenty six times. Jay, I promise you that we know you were helping them, we know that you were protecting them but Jay we need you to look at us. Look at me Jay, please just come here." Spencer replied walking closer, Grayson followed closely and kept his movements as calm as they could be. He knew Spencer was acting only fractionally out of what he should be doing and mostly out of sheer emotion towards what was happening. Hotch stared in something akin shock as Jay got up and hurried over to Reid and then as the young agent uncuffed him and let the older just hug him as he cried. "Jay I want you to listen to me, I'm not letting anyone take you away okay? I need your help Jay, a lot of it." Spencer whispered just loud enough for those in the immediate vicinity to hear him. His voice was shaking as much as his body, even the team could see it too obviously for comfort. Jay and Grayson nodded and they all made their way back to the couch which Reid was previously on before in the waiting room.

"They're gonna Spencer, they're gonna, I'm not going to be able to see you ever, I'm not gonna see either of you. I can't protect you. I can't protect you." Jay wailed as he clung to the genius with everything he had. Since talking didn't seem to be getting him where he wanted, Reid started to hum a tune his mother hummed to him when he was having some sort of mental struggle. It started working immediately, Jay's body started relaxing as Grayson started talking.

"Jay, you've helped us through so much in our lives, you have given Spen and I help when no one else could. When we couldn't handle our lives, when we tried to leave this damned world behind. We're still alive because we found someone, someone good to us that was strong and loving. Jay we're still alive because of you." Grayson choked out, he couldn't keep the tears from streaming down his face. "You've done so much for everyone, so we're going to do something for you, we want you to be so happy Jay. We're going to take you into the happiest world of your life. Right everyone?" when Jay looked up, despite the tears, he smiled to see everyone from the clinic room inside and smiling at him. Telling him they were going to help him too.

"Jay?" Spencer asked causing the older to look at him, despite what he was feeling inside Spencer smiled. It was something Jay would have burned into his mind and most beautiful thing he'd ever witnessed.

"What can I do for you Rabbit?" he asked eventually.

"I want you to close your eyes, lay your head back and listen to everyone. We're going to lead you through a dream everyone will be there." Reid replied, Jay noded and did so without a fight. Grayson traced soothing patterns on his hand while Spencer ran his hand through his hair and started telling him a story. Jay felt himself fall into this state of bliss as he listened to Reid talk of the amazing times the children in the story had.

"Spence, Grayson, you're the best things that ever happened to me. I want you to find peace too." he mumbled with a smile, due to the half conscious state he was in he never felt the needle being inserted into his vein.

"We know, we know how you think of us like the family that you always wanted. Keeping us safe. You know our code don't you? From heaven or from hell, we may be seen as the damned we may be seen as the fortune." Grayson trailed off.

"But even as we're thrown into the depths of the darkest ocean caverns and or the blinding light of the sun we remain together." Reid added the next part as he wiped the tears flowing from his eyes.

"'Nd even though we're not bound...by blood...the three of us will always...stick together. We're brothers forever." Jay ended as his breathing slowed and his pulse started fading.

"That sounds pretty cheesy now, but it's still true. You're always going to be there for us. We'll always look at you like our brother, our protector." Grayson cracked a pitiful smile. Jay opened his eyes one last time and looked to the room of people that he cared for and smiled just as his last breath left him. Everyone was left in silence except for the sound of quiet sobbing from a few of the clinic members. It felt like a long time before people were sent in to retrieve the body, in that time Reid and Grayson hadn't moved from where they were. Jay lay dead in their hands, literally, but they couldn't stop until someone took the body away from them. They didn't put up a fight but the emotions in their eyes, the way Reid curled into himself in the corner and Grayson just leaned against him sobbing gave everyone else a good idea of their state. JJ couldn't help herself anymore and rushed to Reid's side, concerned for his mental state as he accepted the arms around him, he let himself crumble with Grayson. The rest of the team couldn't help but look away or try to avert at least their eyes if not their ears, what Jay had told them about seeing a broken Spencer Reid being the most painful picture had been right. So right that none of them could believe it.

"And to think, he did that, to himself in order to help his friend. He gave him the way out Jay needed. But did it have to be so painful on him? Hotch what are we going to do?" Prentiss whispered, for once in his life on this job Hotch couldn't face his team. He couldn't lead them through this.

"I don't know. I really don't know." he eventually confessed.

A/N: Alright there you have it, my (for now) one shot fic for this. I apologize for the OOC behavior that's probably in there along with any mistakes, I do try and read each thing over at least eight times before I post but I mean I'm not perfect and writers tend to go blind to their own mistakes since we've been playing this out in our head. Thanks to all who have read this and don't hesitate to tell me if you do want more. ~Rena-chan


	2. Ch 2 EDITED: The Loss of a Friend

**A/N:** Thanks to everyone who has followed/favorited (is that a legit word? Not sure but whatever) and/or reviewed this story! This is chapter two, I'm not sure how long it is compared to chapter one because that was when this whole thing was totally fresh in my mind and I haven't finished playing the next few scenes out in my head yet. Sorry for slow updates btw and I hope you enjoy! ~Rena-chan OH and btw for a disclaimer: If I owned this, Criminal Minds would be centered around Reid pretty much only. So yeah, good thing I don't.

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Ch. 2: The Loss of a Friend

 _"Death stings the victim only once, But those left behind feel the pain of loss with every passing memory everyday." ~Unknown_

Rossi watched as Case and Reid headed out of the station together, quietly and without a notification to anyone else. Reid knew Hotch wouldn't press him to talk yet, it was only a matter of time unfortunately, the team would let him have a quiet night with Grayson for which he was thankful Rossi was sure. What he wasn't sure of was if Reid would even bother going back to Virginia with them. It was clear he needed time to mourn the loss of his not one but many friends over this whole case, but Rossi suspected there was more than just that Reid was trying to shoulder. 'One can only hope he comes around alright after this and accepts some help through it all.' he thought before turning away and grabbing his bags with the rest of the team.

"It's not impossible for someone to get over a loss that big is it? I mean he's going to be alright isn't he?" JJ wondered aloud almost frantically while she walked ahead with Emily.

"Impossible? No. Hard? Yes. We have to give him some space first JJ, let him be with Case for a night or even two if that's what it takes to get him emotionally well enough to travel back with us." Morgan replied from behind the two. Neither of them looked entirely convinced it would be as simple as that, secretly Morgan himself doubted they'd be able to get the kid out of Vegas that easily either, but it was the best answer anyone on the team could come up with for now. Give him time, give hims a little space, let him stay close to the friend he still has with him and hopefully things would start mending a little before they left.

"Do we even know if Case is entirely safe? I mean from what I remember of that lady saying at the clinic he's not exactly stable himself. Do you really think he can support Reid and himself emotionally?" Prentiss pointed out, she knew her words weren't helpful, the opposite rather, but it was still a factor in this whole thing.

"Morgan will go and get an assessment of the two of them tomorrow, don't make it an analysis but just check out the living space a little and ask Reid if he's comfortable flying home with us tomorrow." Hotch answered, he too was concerned and unsure how to totally deal with this type of situation but unlike the others he still had to hold up his leader role and play stoneface as much as possible.

"I'd be glad to. Though I may get some resistance with it knowing Reid at least if not his friend." Morgan replied with a nod. 'Why did this happen to Reid of all people? Hasn't he had enough shit to go through already?' he questioned to no one but himself.

"Strauss will probably want us back as soon as possible I assume, she's not incredibly sympathetic. What do you plan to tell her about all this? She'll demand a psych evaluation of Reid if she hears of all the details." Rossi commented more to Hotch than anyone as they headed to their rooms.

"I don't plan on telling her all the details, Reid isn't dumb enough to tell the paid psychologist what's going on and we all know that. He'll tell her exactly what she wants to hear from him to give him the go ahead despite what he's actually feeling and thinking." Hotch replied.

"Just like he did last time." Morgan frowned thinking of the last traumatic experience the young genius went through with them. Well, with them watching rather to be accurate.

"Won't Strauss demand an evaluation anyway since it's still pretty recent since Jayson's leave of the team. I know she hasn't sent them out yet for some of us but I don't doubt it'll be coming soon." Prentiss asked looking at JJ.

"If she does then I'm sure Spence will find a way to skirt around that too. And that's coming from the one who was arguably closer to Gideon than the rest of us except maybe Hotch. If she thinks he's fine she probably assumes the rest of us are better off." the media specialist sighed.

"It's possible she already got Reid's which is why the rest of us haven't had to deal with it." Morgan commented while fishing the keys out of his pocket.

"Whatever the reason, everyone get some rest and sleep in tomorrow. JJ notify me if we have a case." Hotch finalized, ending all the work-related conversations they were having at that moment. His team gave him their collective affirmative and split off to their rooms. 'Whatever happens, it's going to be a long day tomorrow.'

"Something to drink or do you just want to sleep?" Grayson asked, though it felt somewhat like he was talking to a wall. 'Was I like this when I was that depressed back at the clinic?' he briefly wondered as he watched Spencer. He was curled up in the corner of the small couch, his hands bandaged after he had rubbed them so raw in the bathroom they started to bleed a little.

"Warm drink?" the small and scratchy voice reached the older agent's ears at last just before he was about to give up. Reid insisted on all the lights being on in the room, why Grayson was sure that also had something to do with his traumatic childhood so he didn't press the matter, he kept frantically looking out the window and at the door as though he expected someone to break in suddenly. It took Grayson a solid half hour to convince Spencer he didn't need his gun on his person, but the agent kept it close still.

"How does tea sound? I don't think coffee would be wise at this hour." he asked, as he suspected there was no reply to that but he went to find tea that would satisfy his coffee-addicted friend. When he returned he found himself staring into Spencer pressing already wet sleeves to his eyes. His crying was silent, he was too scared to make very much noise and Grayson knew touching him was not going to work either. Instead he just placed the cup of tea down on the table and grabbed a box of kleenex from another table closeby for his friend.

"I c-can't Grayson, I can't." the younger finally whimpered out, knowing that his presence was still recognized, even if only slightly, Grayson slid next to Spencer and pulled him back into his arms.

"You can't what? Talk to me Spen." he started softly, if he was lucky Spencer would just start talking frantically and then he could try and do something about it. If he wasn't lucky, he would do the opposite and close up and that would be a much longer process.

"I can't go back to my team, I can't go back to Virginia. I-I want to forget. I want to forget e-everything." his whispers grew harsher as he spoke, his body was still shaking but it wasn't out of fear and Grayson wasn't totally convinced it was out of pain either. There was something else in his voice, something akin to want.

"How can I help you forget?" he asked, pushing the fear back in his mind. They both knew logically they couldn't forget anything that had happened earlier that day, but logic wasn't the most present thing in either mind at the given moment. Spencer hesitated, slightly, before taking a ginger hold onto Grayson's sleeve and pulled it up to the man's elbow before repeating the action on his own arm.

"Like this." he answered looking between the collection of new and old scars on his arm and the ones on Grayson's. He knew about the older's dirty little secret he kept hidden under long sleeves no matter how hot it got during the summer days in Vegas. He knew because he did it too. They had been for years and years. They used to do it together, but when Spencer moved they had to face it on their own, that's when things got messy. It wasn't hard to hide the rapid growing number of scars, especially not from his mother, he almost felt bad about hiding it from the team. But there was only so much he could let them in on. Grayson swallowed, he had been trying to stay clean for a few weeks, he had just reached the end of his second week, but this had thrown him back a few months.

'It's just for Spencer's sake, he can't not do it yet right? He hasn't gotten that far in his progress. It's just this once, then I can stop, after he leaves with the rest of the FBI I can go back to being clean again.' his brain reasoned with him. He'd be lying to himself if he said he didn't want it, it was like an addicting drug, arguably more dangerous at times, he had been wanting it since the day he promised himself he would stop. 'Jax won't notice, she never has before and she won't this time either. Besides, I can use cover up if I have to go in for a physical check right? And then I'll stop, I'll stop for good. This is for Spencer. This is for Jay.' he eventually nodded and stood, grabbing two almost too convenient razors from his medicine cabinet in the small apartment bathroom he walked back to where Spencer sat on the couch and handed him one as he too sat down.

"Just like old times right?" there was a trace of a smile in the younger's voice, it didn't light up his eyes but it was a start. Grayson nodded, feeling a small similar smile crossing his lips as well. How long had it been since he felt this stable? He didn't remember. But he knew if felt good, sanity that he often feared had already placed itself way out of reach was coming back to him in the form of a little white light in front of his mind.

The first cut he struggled through, it was a little messy but the feeling was almost as good as getting high. He watched as the crimson liquid containing part of his life slid shamelessly down his wrist and onto a deep red towel. Spencer doubted he would be able to get much time away from the team once they got on the flight and then even less back in Quantico, so the feeling had to be strong tonight. 'Do I even want to go back? I would miss the FBI if I left, but things here are so much easier...I could request a transfer but Strauss would want to know the details. If I left would they chase me down? Would they even miss me or notice I was gone? Would they care? It doesn't take a genius to do my job, they'd find someone else.' his stream of thought was interrupted by a laugh. Looking over at Grayson he saw the older smiling widely, a stupid sloppy grin he always wore whenever he was high. At that Spencer couldn't keep his own laughter from spilling out into the air. His cuts were coming easier and easier with every one, it was a good feeling that he had almost forgotten.

"It's been such a long time since we've had a night together, we should do this more often." Grayson started as he got another glass of Red Velvet wine for both of them. Spencer accepted it gratefully and sipped at it, of all the wines he had ever had Red Velvet was surely his favorite and Grayson practically had it on tap.

"We should, at least once a month, I can make arrangements to come see you once a month. The team is always telling me I should take more vacation time anyway, they say I spend too much time in my apartment with my books." Spencer replied with a roll of his eyes, Grayson snorted.

"Once a month sounds good, we kick back here and forget all the terrors that our jobs make us face." the older slurred slightly while Spencer nodded. Though the blades still rested near them, the two only talked about the plans they would make with each other once a month.

"Are you going to go back to work right away?" Spencer eventually voiced as he looked at the state of his friend. Not that he was much better off, actually arguably Grayson was more stable than Spencer was, but looking around at the empty wine bottles and the bandages on their arms he couldn't help but be concerned for his friend's job in the future.

"Yes, I have to, like you I have a job to the people. There's a court case mid-day tomorrow anyway that I need to be a part of." came the reply, Spencer nodded and turned to look out the window, he wondered if he should go back to work as well right away or if it would be better to hole himself up.

'Serial Killers don't turn themselves in, you have a job that needs to be done. Don't be so weak and run away from it. Besides, work helps you forget.' he reminded himself and nodded again to nothing.

"You're friend called, Morgan or somethin', he said he was gonna drop by tomorrow morning." Grayson announced coming back from the kitchen. Spencer didn't even know when he left to take that call. Or that there was a call at all for that matter.

"We should clean up then, and sleep, we'll need to put up a good act for him to clear me to go back to Hotch and start working on our next case." he supplied as he finished off his last glass of wine and sluggishly stood up. The world spun around him, blood loss and alcohol weren't a good combination, but he pushed through it to help his friend clean up the living room then they both made their way to bed. Tomorrow would be long and hard, maybe even begin in the worst was possible, but he had to be okay. He had to push through it.

Morgan found himself on the doorstep of Grayson Case's house at exactly eight thirty in the morning. He would have loved it to be later, but he heard Case had a court meeting and Hotch wanted to see Spencer for himself before he decided anything about them going back. Knocking on the door, he heard nothing, then ringing a the doorbell he heard some shuffling and a muffled response before the door opened revealing Spencer. The circles under his eyes suggested he had a long night, the bed hair and lack of his usual clothing suggested he probably just got up. "Gray is in the shower. You want to come inside?" he asked tenderly, once he fully registered Morgan was actually there and looking him up and down he became flustered and backed up almost behind the door.

"Sure, Hotch wanted me to come over and just see if you were ready to head back today and before you can say an immediate yes he wants you to think about it. You don't need to come back to Virginia right away." Derek started as Spencer lead him over to the couch and placed a drink in front of him before he sat down nursing a cup of coffee.

"I should go back, I don't want to impose on Case. Besides, I miss my books." Spencer said with something close to a ghost of a smile that Derek found hard to believe cross his lips. Morgan took in his appearance again, and then took a glance around the house. Despite looking like hell from a late night, he didn't see anything that would suggest Case or Reid were a danger to themselves at the moment. He guessed there was a lot of crying, he was thankful he wasn't there to witness it, and maybe a few drinks shared going by the wine glasses next to the sink he could only just see.

"And what do you think about going back to work? If you ask me you should take a couple weeks off." although there was no physical change aside from the way Spencer looked out the window, Derek could tell his words affected him in some way.

"Does he think I'm not fit for this? Yes, what happened yesterday was hard. Brutal even, but I'm not so weak that I'm just going to run away from my job and hide myself away. I'm not a child, contrary to apparent belief in the BAU, you can tell Hotch I'll meet you at the jet ten to whenever he wants wheels up." the younger agent decided firmly, there was a look of hurt that flashed briefly in his eyes before it dissolved into what Morgan decided was anger.

"Reid, no one feels like you're weak, you're a member of the team and we care about you Pretty Boy. This case wasn't one any of us want to relive again I assure you that, I'm just saying that no one is gonna blame you for taking some personal time after all this." he tried but was only met with resistance for the rest of his visit. Once he met back with Hotch and the others and explained the reactions, the team collectively decided they would press certain matters later. Much later, and drop all conversations about the case.

"Treat him like he should be here, I know it's hard to especially based on his past. But we have to if only to keep him from closing up." Hotch announced to the team, they agreed, though some reluctantly, and started packing up their things. After all cases were still coming in and they wouldn't have much time before someone called JJ.

"It's unfortunate you have to go so soon, thanks for dropping me off though." Spencer smiled, slightly, as he hugged his friend before they would be parting ways. The other shared their farewells with Jax and Case as well before settling themselves in on the jet to go home. As usual Reid shoved his nose in a book Grayson told him to read, Morgan was sleeping with a pair of headphones on, Hotch and JJ were working on file reports, finally Prentiss and Rossi shared a few drinks while chatting in the back. Everything was as normal as the team could make it seem, but in the back of their minds everyone was wondering how long their acting would last. They were behavioral analysts after all, not CIA agents.

"I wonder where our next case will take us." Prentiss wondered aloud eventually, she wasn't talking about literal place and Rossi knew that. With a slight sigh he shot a quick glance over to Reid and shook his head.

"It's hard to tell, we'll just have to find out when JJ gets that ever so lovely call." he eventually settled on. Prentiss nodded and returned to staring out the window idly sipping at her drink.

"I can actually probably tell you that right now, though I won't give details until tomorrow morning. I want to sleep right now. We're going out to California, San Diego apparently has a mastermind Alcatraz type on the loose somewhere." JJ answered from somewhere in front of the pair.

"An Alcatraz type? Sounds like it'll be a rough case, what are we talking?" Morgan questioned, turning off his music and pointing his attention to JJ as was everyone else.

"I don't currently have all the details since this just came in via text, but the folder should be on my desk tomorrow morning, sounds like we have an aggressive type killer. He makes the victims unrecognizable. They're up to three victims so far. I'll keep you updated." she replied putting her phone away and turning back to look at Hotch, who nodded in approval. The rest of the team sighed and eased themselves into sleep for the rest of their flight. Tomorrow would be long.

As she walked in the office the next morning, thankful for the sleep she was granted, JJ picked up the new case that was on her desk as promised. Not many others were already in the office, Hotch was and she saw Spencer at his desk flipping through his stack. No doubt hoping to finish them off before the day started and of course he was close to refilling his coffee already. "I was wondering if I would be able to steal you for a bit Spence." she announced eventually, noting that he didn't flinch or become startled when she spoke out of the blue. 'Maybe he noticed me walk in.' she thought, he was observant after all.

"Sure, is something wrong?" he immediately asked, causing her to smile a little, always putting others before himself. That was Reid for you.

"No, but this new case we're working with isn't going to be easy. This guy leaves notes but they're in code. Not one either Prentiss or Garcia know how to crack. Maybe you can take a look at it and get some headway before the others get here?" she asked, Spencer nodded and took the papers from her hand with the notes their killer was leaving.

"It has a resemblance to Morse code but there is a change to it. I'll run it through a few times and see what I can get from it. I assume we don't know the background of this UnSub yet?" came the reply, JJ shook her head. "I'd start will ex-military. Not anything recent, far back military, and not from America either. Whoever wrote this clearly adjusted the code and tweaked it to his own liking. Speaking to someone other than the police and us, so we may be looking for a group." he explained, JJ nodded again and went to report that to Hotch before she forgot what all he said.

"Everyone meet in the debriefing room before we head out. The earlier we can get to California the better." Hotch announced once everyone else had filed in, Reid was already at the messy looking whiteboard.

"Wow, is that really still a person?" Prentiss asked with raised eyebrows, Hotch nodded though he found it hard to believe himself from the looks of the picture.

"This used to be Ali Yeager, twenty three years old, she studied at the local university in neurobiology. She was active and from what her parents tell us she never got into an trouble in fear of not getting her degree. She was working towards a PHD from what her professors say and she was an athlete on the side. Pictures from before her murder, reveal she was a brunette of average height, weight, and had a clean record on everything and anything possible. Used to be a cheerleader in high school before going to track and field." JJ explained, the picture revealing a nice looking girl in her running outfit smiling along with several other teammates.

"Okay, so she was a good kid, any sexual abuse?" Morgan asked just to get the question out of the way.

"The body was so deranged when found that there's no clear answer of that, it looked like there wasn't but the doctors couldn't tell for sure." came the reply.

"And this was the last victim right? So who were the other two?" Rossi questioned looking over the girl's file.

"Another female and a male, Alexis Seager, twenty seven years old, it says here that Alexis went off the rails after getting a masters in microbiology. She was a girl who went through hell as a child going from losing parents to her brother going into a medically induced coma, her grandmother was abusive and her grandfather a pimp. What a life. School kept her away it looks like, friends report that she loved being there but after getting her degree she took to the streets and they hardly saw her outside of a few strip clubs." Prentiss read looking a little disturbed at the condition her body was found in.

"The first victim was Justin Forest, twenty years old, and he was a lost cause according to his parents. Never went to classes and probably never would have made it to college had he not gotten a "shape you up" type of girlfriend. He wasn't even planning on going to college originally then he found a love for geology and was even looking to be going for a PHD in it." JJ explained pulling up a picture of the other two victims before their murder.

"Okay so we got three totally different types of people here and yet something connects them enough to make them all targets for this UnSub." Morgan stated.

"Clearly it's not the schools, or the background family/home life." Prentiss started.

"It's their brains..." Reid mumbled from the side of the room where he had been working on decoding. Stepping back he allowed the others to see what he had made of the messages. "Watch them all with fascination, let them lead you into thinking you're blind, they show you up because to them you're worthless. A person without smarts is the equivalent to nothingness. It's time they watch and learn us. Go, it's time to teach those who see us as inferior." he read aloud once it became obvious the others were waiting for him to elaborate on his mumbled words. "This UnSub is targeting these people because they're smart." he added after swallowing, his mouth felt dry and for a minute things became blurred.

"The language doesn't initially say a dominant person but I'm thinking this is the doing of some kind of leader. So we're talking about not just one person but maybe a cult of some sort." Rossi began after reading the message over again.

"Reid? Are you alright?" Morgan's question broke the concentration in the unit chief's head as all eyes turned to the young doctor. Reid numbly nodded but offered no words, and therefore no reassurance. "What's going on Pretty Boy, talk to us." he pressed.

"It's just...those words, often people see those of us with quote on quote more smarts as one of three things. Either we are weak and disposable, useful to use, or pompous and big headed. Often, when trying to explain a concept you're faced with a lot of this hate no matter where you are so we get used to it. The type of people that usually act on the feelings of disdain are, for lack of a better term or statistic, the jocks of civilization. The way this UnSub is speaking suggests maybe they were humiliated at one point, they feel anger and resentment towards people that find themselves higher on the mentally able ladder than others even if it's not by choice." the genius explained with a darkening look towards the words. He knew the others could hear his tone slip into something more akin to anger but at this point he didn't care too immensely. He after all, had been in those exact situations, in the shoes of the victims. 'I'll be damned if I don't end up another target for this sicko.' he thought.

'This is Owen's case all over again only we're on the other side...if Reid draws the attention of the UnSub we'll have a problem.' Hotch thought remembering how aggravated the doctor became when he could identify too well with either the victims or the UnSub as he did in cases prior.

"So we're looking for a group, in California that hates people high on the academic scale for simplicities sake. Any suggestions on where we start looking?" Rossi questioned looking towards JJ.

"I'd start with the graduating classes of this year in the universities, the victims have all crossed paths with our UnSub at some point so we're looking for close by or the same districts maybe even neighborhoods where they could get together and do group work. That area would be most likely around a library, or other monuments that contain vast knowledge for the average or above average learner. Meaning museums, national landmarks and things of the like. Garcia?" Reid asked though his speaking manner was more rushed than necessary when explaining.

"I'm already on it 187. You'll hear from your oracle when she gets something." Garcia replied shuffling around her desk and typing furiously on a computer.

"It looks like the bodies were destroyed pretty good, a show of power most likely, the public is going to be in a panic once they figure out this has to do with intelligence." Prentiss pointed out with a sigh.

"That won't do them any good if it's a group." Morgan countered briefly closing his eyes.

"This group will most likely range anywhere from twelve to fifty people judging by the average amount of people on the highest ranking sports of California. They won't be strangers by any means and it's likely there's at least one if not two or three hostages with them, probably of younger age so many around late teens to early twenties." Spencer supplied with a frown as he looked at the body parts of Alexis Seager in more depth, with that he took a pair of scissors and started cutting up the pieces. It caught the attention of the rest of the team but no one wanted to comment just yet.

"I just talked to the local police, they found another victim." JJ reported coming back into the room.

"We'll have to get their file when we get there, let's get going." Hotch ordered, everyone stood and filed out of the room. Reid still cutting up the pieces of the pictures and writing on a notepad as he did so. Hotch gave him a once over, knowing that he still probably wasn't as stable as normal, wondering if he really should be on this case or not before shaking it off. Reid would have to get through this one, they obviously needed him for more than just decoding.

 **A/N:** Alright guys I think I'm going to stop it there for chapter two, I know it's a little shorter than the first chapter and I apologize for not only that but also the looooong ass time it took me to update this. Trust me I never forgot about it and it seems Criminal Minds stories are always on my brain now so if I were you and I enjoyed reading this them maybe send me a PM saying you'd like to see another one afterwords? This one isn't finished yet but I always like keeping a few open at all times to keep thoughts flowing. Anyway if I didn't say this before, there's a reason this sight is called _fan_ fiction so no I don't own the characters, except my plethora of dead victims and UnSubs who are all my own characters. I reference a lot of episodes in this one, mainly Elephant's Memory so no I don't own the events to that either. Keep reading and stay tuned for chapter three. When they actually get to California.


	3. Ch 3: Searching For Answers

**A/N:** Okay hi I know it's been a long time since I updated this story, thanks to everyone reading/following it and just so everyone knows school is starting soon so yeah updates are not going to be fast (I say that as though they ever were in the first place) but I am not going to abandon any of my stories and hopefully I'll be able to get the next chapter out to you all soon. As per usual this is a story of abuse and yada yada yada so you know, warnings warnings bla bla bla aaand there's a reason this site is called _fan_ fiction not _IOwnThis_ fiction.

Ch. 3: Searching For Answers

As the agents were lead into the building that contained less than a quarter of the local police, they were informed on the latest findings. "This case is giving me nightmares, I just don't understand how people can see mental ability as a downside. Uhg! Do you have any idea how creepy you have to be in order to just..." Garcia cut herself off while making a face on the other end of the phone line.

"I know baby girl, just keep your fancy fingers working for me and hopefully we'll be back in Virginia soon." Derek replied with an inaudible sigh.

"Speaking of mental ability, how's 187 doing?" the tech analyst asked, a new tone to her voice and a pause in her typing told Morgan she, like everyone else, hadn't stopped worrying about the younger agent.

"That's a good question Sugarmama, I've been trying to keep tabs on him but he's shut me out hard." he replied looking to make sure Reid was out of earshot.

"You too..." Garcia mumbled in a quiet pained voice.

"Me too?" came the question.

"JJ called me earlier and I asked her the same question, she said she can't get through to him at all. So far it doesn't seem like he's degrading or turning to substance use she said but she's worried because he won't open up and she caught a glimpse of a bandage on his arm but he wouldn't tell her anything about it she says he's been off in his own mind so much that she doesn't know what to do about it and Derek what if he's a danger to himself? What if he just leaves the hotel one day and the he's just gone, done no more Reid no more genius no more trace and I just don't know what I should be doing! I want to call him but I don't think it'll help an-"

"Woah woah! Slow down there baby girl I need you to breathe for me okay? I'll talk to JJ and find out whatever it is that's going on okay? I promise we're not just gonna leave him be after this. He's already lost too many people in his life. Even if Pretty Boy doesn't like we'll be here for him. I'll see if I can pry him open a bit." Morgan assured the worried agent.

"Keep me updated?" Penelope asked getting back to her typing.

"Always, we'll be home soon. This case is driving us all up the walls." he sighed looking around again. Hotch was still talking to the local detective, Reid was putting up the pieces of the pictures he had cut out, JJ was talking to some other guy most likely involved with the families or the media while Prentiss and Rossi were slaving away over paperwork.

"You know all of these victims only have one stand out injury no matter what." Reid mumbled when Morgan had come up beside him. The older was unclear if he was talking to himself or him but he'd take the chance.

"Oh? And what's that?" he asked noticing how Reid didn't flinch or become startled like usual.

"They all have a brand, it's small, probably looked to be nothing but birthmarks on their skin but it's the same code that was used to write that message." Reid continued looking from one picture to the next.

"And what does it say?" Morgan prompted trying to find whatever Reid was looking at.

"On Justin Forest it says "Tenebris" on Alexis Seager "Lethe" and on Ali Yeager "Inanimis". Those are all Latin terms, tenebris is darkness, inanimis is soulless and Lethe is the river of forgetfulness in the Underworld. Soulless and forgetfulness makes sense because the UnSub or UnSubs want these people to feel like they're nothing special compared to the rest of the world. Darkness doesn't fit in so we're missing something there. However we know whoever did this took Latin as a language in high school, most likely that means they either went to a San Diego school or Lowell high school in San Francisco. With that, because there's a possibility of there being more than one UnSub and we know they all need to be able to read the code of their group, we should look into possible outside Latin study or learning groups because it's possible one of the members either attends or runs one." the genius explained, turning to find everyone staring at him. Apparently his rambling was interesting enough, or at least the beginning of getting something other than human body parts, to where the others stopped to pay attention.

"Did you get that Garcia?" Prentiss asked glancing at the phone she was holding up.

"You bet I did and okay so here we go, we have three different outside of school Latin study groups in San Diego, and one near Lowell high school. I looked into the websites of all of them and the last one looks exclusive compared to the others. They only offer this club to advanced learners and by the looks of it I would say it's not in a district you'd normally find teenagers or college students going to just have a good time and become smarter." Garcia answered.

"Can you get the name of a leader or who owns the building? Whoever is there would have the best chances of knowing our UnSub." Rossi stated.

"It looks like a man named Austin Tall yet he goes by the name Anguis, he's thirty two years old, used to be a football player at Lowell high school before he was kicked off the team for assaulting a kid in his chemistry class and sending him to the hospital with several broken bones and a fractured skull. Looks like the victim was in fact a smarter than average student who would have graduated a year early had it not been for him missing so much school to be in the hospital. After being kicked off the team Tall was sent to a detention center before coming back to school having to retake classes because he never finished them causing him to be a year behind most students his age. He never went to college and after taking Latin as well as several coding classes he pretty much just drops off the face of the Earth according to society. I'm sending you the address of his house, the club, and the boy in his class named Jacob Press who is now twenty nine." Garcia hashed out.

"Thanks Garcia, if you find anything out on members of that club then call us." Hotch instructed firmly.

"Always boss man. Garcia out." came the reply before the call was cut off.

"Reid, you and Prentiss go to the Press household, Morgan and JJ will go to the club and Rossi and I will head to Tall's house." Hotch ordered, the team gave their agreements and split up with police and SWAT following. Morgan looked over to JJ and nodded as they made their way out of earshot of the other team members.

"I called Garcia earlier and she sounded pretty lost on what to do about Reid, have you been able to get anywhere with him?" he asked once they had gotten into their SUV.

"No, I tried earlier but he's determined to keep this all locked up until we get back to Quantico apparently if not forever. All he gave me was that if happened in Vegas..." JJ replied with a heavy sigh as he put a hand to her head.

"And what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas I suppose is where that train of thought is going. Dammit! This is Maeve's case all over again only he actually _did_ kill the UnSub and the UnSub was the one he knew." Morgan shook his head.

"Are we going to lose him again? He showed up to work today and he's still working the cases unlike with Maeve but have you noticed how he absentmindedly rubs at his arms when he's not doing anything?" JJ questioned remembering the action he displayed on the plain more than once as well as while they were getting briefed by the police.

"Do you think he's using again?" Morgan questioned just to get the topic out in the open no matter how much he hated to think about it.

"I don't know, it doesn't feel right to go through his personal things to find out if he is or not, I'd rather he just tell us by himself-" JJ started but Morgan shook his head.

"We all know that's not going to happen JJ, this is Reid, he doesn't just come out in the open and tell us things like that. If he had his way he'll suffer in silence until Hotch forces him to do something or he hits rock bottom and leaves the BAU and his sanity behind." he pointed out.

"I hope it's the former, because God help us if we ever lose Reid." the blond media specialist closed her eyes. Morgan couldn't help but to agree with her on that. Even though the genius wasn't the most athletically built person on the team they'd surely be at a loss if it wasn't for his brain. Thinking back on all the cases the young kid had helped them solve Morgan wondered what would have happened had Reid never joined the BAU.

'Would he have been one of the victims to his old friend? How much later in life would we have crossed paths with him if at all.' he couldn't help but think, it wasn't as though he liked any of the outcomes his brain came up with but sometimes he couldn't help wondering if he would have found half of his team dead and in one of the millions of pictures they go through on a weekly basis in order to find one killer.

On their way to the Phoren household Prentiss silently looked over at Reid's arm, covered by his usual sweater, noticing there were a few red stains on the usually pristine clothing. Deciding not to comment on it, or show any indication of even noticing it, Emily turned her eyes back on the road but kept her peripheral vision on the doctor beside her. "Do you think this Phoren kid is the true stresser of this whole thing? I mean, is it possible that Tall is the only UnSub or are you sure there's more than one?" she decided on asking if just to get her coworker to talk about something.

"It's possible Phoren was just an easy target that made Tall's whole world bad enough to snap him, but I don't know if I would say he's the only thing that flipped him over the edge, in order to determine that I will need to see how he talks and acts with us. And while it's possible there are other UnSubs that have something to do with the murders it's unlikely a large group of people would follow someone to murdering others. That being said if this is some sort of...I don't want to say terrorism but if it's some sort of cult or group of people that all think as similarly as the main leader then we could be running around here for quite a long time. Once we catch one of them, it's not like the others will stick around. They will run and hide and possibly move overseas in order to remain safe." came the lengthy but flat toned response.

"How many people do you think we've caused to leave this country in order to carry out their killing elsewhere?" it was something Emily tried not to think about too often, how many people were still out there and how many left to keep themselves hidden from the FBI, but it was impossible not to think about at all.

"Most likely less than you imagine, killers like the ones we deal with tend to stay in the area of they don't know they're being pursued and some do even when they know they're being tracked by the police. It's all about the thrill, the adrenaline or the fact that they don't think they're doing anything wrong." Spencer answered, he couldn't help the image of Jay flashing in his head and felt the healing wounds on his arm burn just a little more.

"Is there something wrong with your arm?" Emily asked, noting that he had gone silent and was putting light pressure on his arm as though trying to work out a muscle kink in it. 'Or covering something up.' her mind added even though she willed it to not be the case.

"What? Oh, no, it's fine I just hit it on the table corner yesterday and I think it bruised." he replied with a slight shake of his head, rubbing at it slightly. It was enough to pull the sleeve up ever so slightly, the white of the bandages caught Emily's attention and she bit her lip a little harder than necessary because she knew the meaning behind them.

'It's not likely I'll be able to get far with Reid...but Morgan probably can, I'll have to call him later when I'm not with Spencer.' she decided.

"Morgan." the male agent said while he and JJ split up around the building.

"It's Prentiss, hey look this isn't about the case, are you free?" Emily asked while she watched Spencer talk to Jacob at the door.

"It's as good as you're going to get me this week, I take it you found something." came the knowing reply, as he looked through windows and the surrounding areas Morgan mentally braced himself for whatever he was about to hear.

"I did, but I have no clue how to approach it, when we were in the car he was rubbing at his arm and it lifted up his sleeve a little. He's cutting Morgan, I don't know if that's classified as better or worse than the drugs but that's what he turned to and I highly doubt that Case didn't do the same thing." she confessed with a sigh, if Hotch were there he would be telling them to keep their minds focused on the case until it was over before trying to deal with anything personal.

"It's not effecting the case or his working ability yet so we probably won't get anywhere with him until we get back to base. Keep an eye on him and keep me posted." he told her, even though he would have liked to stop time and fix the problem with his friend first he knew he could truly approach that while they were miles away from any place he felt comfortable enough to start speaking to them on such a personal level.

"Do you think we'll be able to approach it at all once we get back home even? It's not like he goes down willingly. Even if we're trying to help what's the likelihood that he sees it the same way we do?" Emily pressed further.

"It's not likely. But Pretty Boy is going to have to deal with the help because I'm not letting him sit in his apartment like he did last time where we had no clue how he was doing. So let's get this case done with so we can get back home and figure out what to do." Morgan replied, finding an unlocked window and shining his flashlight inside to see if he could see anyone or anything. Prentiss hung up the call and he opened it enough to slip inside and meet up with JJ.

"Doesn't look like anyone is here, let's call Hotch and see if he has anything." she advised, Morgan nodded, settling on not telling her what Emily had told him over the phone for her sake more than anything.

'She would be devastated if she found out.' he pointed out to himself as they walked to the entrance of the club.

"Hey Hotch it's JJ, we've checked out the club and it's about as deserted as can be right now. No indication of murder or plans for it that we can see. Oh? Have you found out if there are any more? We'll head back to the station then." she hung up and turned to Morgan, "Apparently they caught Tall and a friend of his trying to suffocate someone, SWAT took them down and they're in custody so we're meeting them back at the station." she explained to which Morgan nodded.

"I'll call Reid and tell them to meet us back at the station, looks like we're going home early." he replied pulling out his phone.

"Reid." the young agent answered before he and Emily excited the Phoran house and headed to their car. "Oh? Are there anymore out there that they know of? Ok, we'll meet you there." he finished closing the phone and opening the door.

"Was that Hotch?" Emily asked but Reid shook his head.

"No it was Morgan, he said that Hotch and Rossi apparently had some luck getting both Tall and someone else trying to commit their latest murder. The two of them are in custody and there doesn't appear to be anyone else knowingly involved in the murders so we're meeting them back at the station." he answered, rubbing at his arm again as he watched out the window. Emily made a gesture of slight surprise but nodded as they pulled away from the driveway and towards the police station.

"I'm glad, this case was not fun." she sighed in slight relief.

"None of them are." Reid pointed out to which the black haired agent couldn't help but agree.

After everyone finished gathering at the police station and the interrogations were quickly done with no other indications of their being any more murderers on the loose for now the team quickly said their goodbyes and headed back to Quantico on the jet. Morgan purposefully placed himself close to Reid, watching as he attempted to sleep many times but ultimately always woke up. It lead the older agent to wonder how many nights out of the week Reid actually did get to sleep and how many of them he was just awake with his thoughts. More than Morgan would like to know about for sure. 'At least on the jet he can't do anything to hurt himself, he wouldn't take that risk of all of us finding out about it.' he assure himself, though he did note the red stains on the younger's sweater as Emily told him where they would be.

"I want everyone to get some sleep, who knows what we have to do tomorrow and this case was both easy and not." Hotch directed once everyone was off the jet.

"Sounds good to me man, hey Pretty Boy I'll take you home tonight. You got your things?" Morgan questioned turning to the young doctor. Reid nodded and the two bid their farewells to the rest of the team before heading off to Reid's apartment.

"Thank you, for driving me home I mean." Reid started once the car was parked in the driveway though Morgan had yet to unlock the doors.

"Kid, look at me for a sec, I know you don't want to talk and that you're not ready yet for a lot of personal invasion by anyone. But you have people here for you. We're not going to just up and leave you in the dust because of what happened back in Vegas." he started, effectively making Reid look away from him.

"I'd rather leave what happened in Vegas in Vegas. There's no need to bring it up all the way out here." he replied shortly.

"I'm glad you feel that way, but you're not dumb enough to think that's actually possible. None of us just get to leave behind the past this way and shoving a bunch of work in front of you won't do anything good for you either." Morgan continued despite that he knew he was backing his friend into a corner.

"It's over Morgan, what happened on the case happened on the case. There's nothing I can do about it and I know that." Spencer countered opening the door with minimal effort.

"And what about all that happened not on the case? We're not all geniuses Kid, but you can't hide from any of us that easily."

"I'm not hiding Morgan! Is it so terrible to wish I can just leave things in the past sometimes? To not have my past completely dissected and displayed in front of everyone to see? Or have my personal thoughts and feelings told to everyone I work with so I can have people tiptoe around me like I'm going to break all the time?" the doctor seethed, not waiting for a response he stormed to his door and unlocked it before slamming it shut. Morgan, of course, couldn't leave it at that and followed him and threw the door open. Facing Reid he closed the door behind him and stared at the blazing eyes that would have killed him if looks could do that.

"No, it's not too much to ask that the past stays that way, we all have a past we don't way openly shared with even our closest friends but when the past affects your health and mentality then something has to be done to change something." he pointed out.

"It's been days Morgan! What can you possibly think would be so detrimental to my health and sanity that could have happened in the last couple of days?!" Reid shouted, it took a lot out of him to keep screaming at his friend but at the moment he didn't care.

"You would know wouldn't you Reid? Don't play dumb with me I already know about it so there's no point in trying to hide it from me!" Morgan's voice rose with his friend's as the other continued to push him away.

"And what exactly do you know?" Reid spat the question as though it was poison. Morgan knew he wasn't asking about what he knew of Reid's habit. He was asking about what Morgan knew of the feelings and emotions that were running through the genius' head. The hurt, guilt, pain, self hate and so many more things Morgan doubt he could think of.

"I don't know half as much as you do, but if you don't let me help you then I'll never find out and sooner rather than later I be attending your damn funeral Reid! Think about your team, your friends we don't want you to go through all this alone. We're not going to leave it as is either! That's part of what makes us a team."

"Get out Morgan. Just go." Spencer eventually sighed sitting down on the couch, the anger and energy both leaving his body as fast as it came.

"I'm not going unless you give me every sharp object you own in this apartment." Morgan replied firmly staying where he stood by the door. Reid looked up at that, the color draining from his already pale and tired face.

"What?" he asked unintelligibly.

"I know Reid, I know about your cutting. And I'm not the only one." Morgan confessed with a soft sigh. Reid felt time almost come to a complete stop, how did he know so early? How much did he work out? What was he going to do now? It was all too much to think about, his head hurt, his arms burned, his vision blurred and suddenly the world went black.

 **A/N:** Well that was a bit of an intense ending wasn't it. I hope you all liked this chapter, once again I'm sorry for it coming out so late. But yeah thanks for reading and as always reviews are appreciated but don't feel pressured to leave them. There's more to come, as always, Spencer isn't out of the woods yet, Morgan will make damn sure about that, and what about the person that caused Reid to be in a center in the first place? Oh yeah, they're going to make an appearance again so stay tuned and as always keep on Reiding :)


	4. Ch 4: Hospitals and Institutions

**A/N:** How long has it been since I posted something decent to this story? Hopefully not too long for all of you still reading this and the new people that have come to look at my shitty writing! I hope you guys enjoy this next chapter, self-harm warning for this chapter and like the last three obviously, and as per usual I don't own CM otherwise it would never be as good as it is now. Though there would be more Reid. Enjoy humans!

Ch. 4 Hospitals and Institutions

"911 what's your emergency?" a feminine voice questioned on the other end of the line.

"I have a friend that just collapsed in his apartment, I need an ambulance sent here immediately." Morgan urged before giving the woman Spencer's address and soon after calling Hotch to notify him about what had just transpired. Sirens made it hard to hear what all Hotch was saying but there was a few choice words Morgan could clearly make out and an order to call him once they got to the hospital.

"Whatever you do, don't tell Garcia anything yet." the FBI chief added as an afterthought.

"What about JJ, Prentiss and Rossi? They're all gonna have to find out at some point Hotch. Pretty boy is under some serious watch with all of us." Morgan sighed as the paramedics stormed in and started unwrapping the bandages on Reid's arms to insert an IV somewhere.

"I'll take care of notifying Prentiss and Rossi, and I'll have Prentiss break it to JJ. Once Reid is at the hospital you can call Garcia and have her come down as well. Just get him somewhere safe Morgan." Hotch ordered. Morgan gave his affirmative and hung up the call before following Spencer's gurney into the back of an ambulance.

"I take it you will be staying at the hospital with Dr. Reid?" one of the nurses questioned briefly looking at Morgan, who was watching every move she made to his best friend.

"That'd be correct, I am meeting up with the rest of our team at the hospital. Our unit chief is listed as his medical contact." Morgan explained to which the nurse nodded as she continued to work on cleaning the more recent cuts on Reid's arms.

"He's clearly not able to be out on the field Rossi, he's going to get himself or someone else killed if he can't sort this out quickly." Hotch argued, the two had been together since before Morgan's call thus Rossi was the first aside from Morgan to know about the ordeal. Hotch had proposed his thinking that they should take Reid somewhere he can get help, immediately, but there would of course be consequences to such a decision. Consequences that Rossi knew would not bode well for anyone on the team.

"It won't help him, you know how Reid is, he'll socially if not physically keep himself isolated. There's few people he trusts to begin with and I assure you that none of them are in a mental ward." the older pointed out with a sigh, it was like trying to catch a killer that could outsmart them at every turn. Reid was always a few steps out of reach, his emotional walls were too thick for them to get through so easily. And they had been working with the young genius for years now.

"He's not safe with us though, I cannot in good judgement keep sending him to work with the things we do and then sending him home every night with having a small clue of what he went through. That would be irresponsible and even cruel of me." Hotch was irritated and tired of arguing with his good friend but he knew they had to have some sort of discussion surrounding the very prominent issues of their coworker.

"He's not going to be any safer by himself Hotch, you have to realize that he's not going to be safe wherever he goes. This is Reid we're talking about, not Morgan, not Penelope, not Prentiss, Reid. He's essentially a magnet for dangerous situations and we've been lucky all these times that we've been able to keep him alive or that he's been able to get himself out of problematic situations by using that big brain of his. Hotch, we're his friends and his team but we're not here to re-write his childhood and make all the decisions for him. Now let's save this discussion for later, we've arrived and Morgan is already pacing." the older pointed up ahead where Morgan was indeed pacing in a waiting room. He looked to be muttering something, only then did the two notice he was on the phone most likely with JJ, who would be arriving shortly, or a frantic Garcia.

"Yes, yes text me as soon as you get here and I'll send you his room number. Drive safe, we don't need anyone else in this place tonight, we'll see you soon Sugar Mama." Morgan hung up on his call with Garcia and shook his head at Hotch and Rossi. "Welcome, probably won't be the last we see of this place, Garcia is on her way, I assume JJ and Prentiss are in that car pulling up right now and they're still setting up a room for Pretty Boy." he informed his chief and senior agent with a sigh. Hotch nodded and walked up to the desk to inform the intendant of their purpose here while Rossi pulled Morgan off to the side.

"How was he on the way home?" Rossi questioned, he knew there had to have been some sort of commotion before coming here but he had hoped nothing put the two agents on edge too much. They'd need Morgan to get through to Reid after all.

"Quiet and reserved, big surprise there, this isn't going to be a one time thing Rossi. He's adamant about not talking to anyone." Morgan confessed, running a hand over his scalp, if only he could get Reid to talk to someone who could help him.

"That's a problem, as I expected it would be, Hotch wants to put Reid under watch in an impatient care center. But by what you've just told me and what I know there would be more problems if we sent him to a place like that. Especially right now." Rossi crossed his arms and stared out the window, Morgan frowned at him.

"Hotch wants to send Reid to a place like that after knowing how he is? It would be like saying he failed and then throwing it back into his face. Despite how it seems we should keep Reid on the field, working that head of his is the only way he's going to emotionally stay around us otherwise we might as well never see him again. He'll go right back to that guy, Case, and they'll both be a wreck feeding off of each other." the younger agent explained though hushed.

"Case? Is he in a similar position as Reid?" Prentiss asked, having overheard the conversation after she and JJ walked in.

"One can only assume so since they were both equally involved and shared a lot of the same behaviors during, before and after everything that happened. Not to mention Josephine told us they had similar problematic situations at the clinic when they were there. It only makes sense they would have similar reactions." Rossi explained after a moment.

"Do you think we should call Case's boss and inform her of everything we're dealing with before she has to go through it as well?" Prentiss wondered aloud already pulling out her phone to call the SVU chief.

"Ask Hotch before you do anything, just in case he wants to make sure of anything before we notify her, in the long run however we probably should." Morgan answered.

"Hotchner." came the response quit and stoned as always, he had stepped out of the hospital for one reason or another but Emily wasn't about to go searching for him with this situation; instead she took a mental breath before speaking.

"Hotch it's Emily, I think we should call the SVU chief and tell her what happened with Reid. Rossi, Morgan and I think that whatever went on with Reid he likely wasn't alone in the process. Case is the only contact Reid has had for an extended amount of time and we're worried he might be in a similar situation soon. If someone doesn't get to him he could be dead before we have a chance." she rushed out slightly as she stepped away from the medics and her three coworkers.

"I'll call Jax and inform her of what is going on, in the meantime Emily I want Reid under watch at all times when he wakes up. Get a psychologist or someone professional in there with him, I need an assessment and I need one within the hour." he ordered before the two hung up and Emily turned back to the other agents.

"Hotch wants a mental assessment within the hour and he's going to inform Jap." she informed with a troubled look crossing through her eyes.

"Even if we send in someone to do that Reid can pass any mental exam known to man despite what just happened. On paper he'll look fine." Morgan deadpanned, neither of the other two could disagree with that.

"Maybe that's what we need, keeping Reid on the field is what we've decided would be best for him. It would create something to keep his mind going, these cases provide that and have been since he joined the BAU. So...let's say we give him a mental exam, he passes and we keep him working. Then all we have to arrange is for night watch. He won't be happy with it but he doesn't have a choice anymore." Rossi suggested.

"Hotch wants to institutionalize him?" JJ started after he brain caught up to what she was hearing. "After his known fear of ending up like his mother? I'd rather force him under house arrest at my own home!" she continued on with her voice rising as well as her tears.

"We know, and reality is all Hotch wants to do is protect him, we all do. Which is why we need to convince Hotch it's a terrible idea, and convince Reid to allow himself to be put under night watch. This is going to bring up memories of a certain case we all never want to think about. We need to be there for support and we need to act as normal around him as possible." Morgan assured her, JJ nodded and accepted the side embrace from Prentiss.

"So what do we start with?" the brunette asked after glancing around them at incoming patients.

"Making sure Reid passes his mental assessment and we all know someone who would go to ends no one else can to make sure that happens." Rossi answered before he opened his cell and dialed.

"Rossi you better have something for me to do because my hands won't stop shaking and the plane isn't getting here fast enough." Garcia started out, she was flying commercial since the team had the jet, and it wasn't often she wished she could interrupt all the other planes signals so her would get there first but this was a rare time in her life she wished she wasn't as good as she was.

"Don't worry Baby Girl we have something for you to do. We need you to make sure Pretty Boy passes his soon to be mental health exam. We need someone fresh out of the academy, not super confident in what they're doing over here within the next twenty minutes. Think you can do that for us?" Morgan's voice reached over to her earpiece causing a sly smile to creep across her cherry red lips.

"I will have to do some things that may or may not be technically illegal..." she started but Rossi cut her off.

"We never heard anything Garcia." he assured.

"Then consider it done, and I'll see you all soon, keep Junior G-man awake for me until I get there." she pleaded before hanging up. Morgan shook his head slightly as the doctor came up behind the group of agents.

"Dr. Spencer Reid?" he asked, blinking for a second as al eyes turned onto him before he smoothly continued. "The good news is he is stable and we moved him into a recovery room. There's will only be small lasting scars and for the most part we aren't worried about his vitals. Now, the unfortunate news is the circumstances in which he was brought here. Dr. Reid will need to undergo some psycho evaluations as I'm sure you all know and it will be suggested he take a leave of absence from his work in order to complete a nine step program for himself." he rattled off before looking up again at the agents.

"How are we going to get Hotch to agree with keeping Spence on the field? He'll want to keep him safe by any means necessary." JJ whispered as she closed her eyes and rubbed at her face.

"We may not be getting his approval, I'll keep talking to him but in the long run we may have to keep working against him until this is all over." Rossi sighed with a look into the window of Spencer's room. He had texted Aaron where they were already and he could practically hear Garcia's rushed footsteps as she neared the place. He almost wondered if he was hearing them for real until he turned around and saw the woman with gift bags by the dozen piled in her arms.

"Where are we going to fit all of those?" Prentiss blinked when the tech analyst finally reached the group.

"I'll find a place to put all of them I promise, I just didn't know what to get and where from and I didn't know if I should bake cookies or buy chocolate so I went to the store and got both and I think I brought books he would like, there are a few word searches and all my old papers with cross words that I could never solve but this is Reid so he'll be able to do them in less than five minutes and I-" Morgan cut her off on her ramble by placing a hand on her shoulder while the girls helped unloading bags.

"You might want to start sooner or later, he'll be awake soon." he advised, Garcia nodded and marched in the room with the determination of an analyst, JJ and Prentiss behind her to help out.

 **A/N:** Alright well there's that, again I apologize for this being soooo late and in the next chapter we'll find out if Spencer will be admitted to a mental hospital or if his team will manage to keep him on the field against Hotch's will. And of course in the future Strauss will make an entrance you won't want to miss. Thanks to everyone who has favorited, liked, read and reviewed this story! Keep Calm and Fanfiction On! ~Len-kun


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